What if it Offends Me to Use Your Preferred Pronouns?

I squirmed a little in my seat at Morrill Hall, not sure if I should engage the new person on my right or my left. It was the start of the spring semester at Iowa State in 2016, transgender-ism and preferred pronouns were becoming an issue, and this was the first time The Writer’s Guild was meeting for the semester. Though a faithful attendee the previous semester, I still felt a little out of place.

I started writing a book the semester before, and my mentor was part of the club. She suggested I join. And I’ll admit, I went so I could find other writers to edit my novel, but I ended up very much enjoying the company of other writers. Even though writing seemed to be the only interest we had in common.

Just as I got up the nerve to introduce myself to a blue-haired woman to my left, the vice president of the club walked up to the front of the class. “Wow, there are so many people here. This is wonderful.”

As conversations die down, she introduced herself then prompted us to introduce ourselves. “Oh, and we should all say our preferred pronoun. I just think that is super important.”

My jaw dropped.

Even though I was sitting in the front row, I don’t think anyone noticed my discomfort or the fact that my face was making some very unusual expressions.