How to Date as a Christian: The Downside to Dating to Marry

Dating isn’t a Biblical practice, so there is a vast debate among Christians about how to go about dating. When to kiss, how much to share, when to move in together, etc. Couples struggle with that anyway, but Christians have to decide how best to follow God through all of it.

My husband and I ran into a lot of problems when we were dating because we were dating to marry. And I’m not talking about sex. We had issues because we were still two separate people trying to be one. I’m talking about finances, living situations, weekend plans, buying groceries, parents, etc. We weren’t able to pool our resources, nor were we able to step into each other’s family struggles.

Then why date? If it’s such a problem. Why not just get married?

Um, what if we hate each other? What if we come across a deal-breaker? What if their family is crazy? There are too many factors that could go wrong. Dating is necessary.

Let’s break down what dating to marry means — it means you act like you are married or getting married while you are dating. The reason Zach and I dated was to get to know each other, work on our communication, and figure out how to be partners. We were figuring out how to take care of each other and how to pursue our goals together. We saw if we could be married without the…